Friday, January 27, 2012

When fate steps in ...

It is amazing, really.

You’re traveling along on your own little journey, lost in your own little world, and out of nowhere it seems, the right something (or dare I even say, someone?) crosses paths with yours. When I say right, I mean that certain something (and yes okay, possibly someone) who’s sudden, un-expected presence makes you stop dead-in-your-tracks so that you can catch your breath.

Because it’s just what you needed. The realization takes your breath away.  

And you can’t believe your luck that it just showed up one day, out of the blue, when you weren’t even looking for anything like it. When you didn’t even know that it was just the thing you’ve been missing in your travels all along.

So, you take it with you as you continue onward.

You embrace it.

You’re grateful for it.

You give it all you’ve got.  For what it’s worth, it changes you enough where you re-evaluate where you’re going and how you plan to get there.

For some, that certain, perfect something could be just the right job opportunity where taking it opens the door of possibilities for the most fulfilling and rewarding career imagined.  For me, that certain, perfect something might actually be a someone.

So far, I feel as if I cannot get enough. Enough of his presence, his voice, his hands. His eyes locked with mine. I swear, every time he kisses me my heart breaks wide open wanting to give back to him every feeling he gives me.

Truthfully, I’ve had to stop and catch my breath quite a few times since we met. There was an immediate connection and the feelings were there fast, furious and without any sort of warning. I didn’t want to believe that any of it was real or even possible, so at one point early on, I tried to turn around and travel off in a different direction away from him.

But I didn’t. I couldn’t. I came right back to where he was standing; waiting patiently.

And I’m embracing it.

And not only am I grateful to have met him, but the significance of him waiting it out while I stumbled around in disbelief in the beginning does not go unnoticed.

I want to give it all I’ve got, as if I’ve got nothing to lose and like I’ve never been hurt before.  For what it's worth, he's wonderful and where this is going could change everything. 

11 comments:

  1. I love this and it is SO true. When it's meant to happen...it just does. And it's meant to be. Hold on tight, this sounds like just what you need and have always deserved!

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    1. Only time will tell, but I do know that I am ready for whatever the road ahead may bring me. I know this because I feel totally complete and whole all on my own; I don't expect Mr. Handsome to complete me. I don't expect anyone to. Only I can cultivate my own happiness; my own wonderful.

      I've learned that really being with someone is so much more than previously thought. It's not about what you're expected to get. It's about what you're expected to give. And if you can't give all you've got, without holding back and throwing up walls and defenses, without letting your past restrict the possibilities of your future, ... then really ... what the hell is the point of trying to share your life with anyone?

      I appreciate your enthusiasm for me! I think you may be my most verbal fan thus far. Thank you!! I do expect to get some flack and negativity in response to this post ... considering where I am in the divorce process, the timing, my son etc.

      But you know what? I don't care. For the first time in my life I feel confident and 100% sure of who I am, what I want and what is or isn't best for me. This is an example where I am not letting judgement (actual or fabricated out of fear) hold me back; not in life or in my blogging.

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  2. Ya know what? If you do get flak, I agree, whatever, it is your life, and only YOU know what is best for YOU, nobody else does. Of course everyone has an opinion, and I'm glad you are ready for it, if it happens, but things happen for a reason, I firmly believe that!

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    1. Is it flack or flak? I have no idea. This is where the engineer in me shines though. Spelling. I'll spell however I want, damnit! LOL.

      I do plan on posting a blog about every individual's path and rate of recovery being as unique of an experience as it is that no two people are the same. Coming soon ...

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  3. If you are Happy (and it definitely sounds like you are!!) Then who cares what everyone else thinks...the ones that love and support you will be happy for you no matter what..I know I am happy for you, you've come a long way in the past few months and it shows!

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  4. He betta be the very best God has to offer. You deserve it

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    1. Awe, thank you. For once in my life I actually believe that! Only took me just under 30 years to figure out my worth. Now I get to live up to it before I've squandered my short time here. Saying I'm grateful for figuring it out, walking away from my past mistakes and making positive changes in my life is a HUGE understatement :)

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  5. This is so beautiful...a new beginning. Just taking that first step to opening up your heart again after a divorce can be so hard but your post makes me smile as I'm feeling this too right now, all of these after 2 years. Best of luck!

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    1. Thank you! And best of luck to you too, my dear! I feel like through divorce, I have improved my ability to pick a more compatible mate. I sure as heck know what I DON'T want. Ha!

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